🥣 A Recipe For Happiness
Ingredients
☐ 1 Canon EOS Rebel T7☐ 1 sheet of white 8.5" x 11" paper
☐ 1 cup sugar
☐ 1 bowl
☐ 1 highlighter brush
☐ 1 black sharpie
☐ 2 eggs
☐ 1 rainbow whisk
☐ 1 bunny ears contact lens case
☐ 1 iOS 12.0+ device
☐ 1 vacuum
Procedure
1. Take one egg and separate its egg white from the yolk.2. Pour the egg white into the bowl.
3. Take the rainbow whisk and b̶̪̲̣̺̣͈̹͐̒́e̶̗̓ạ̵̝͠t̷͎̞̳͎̞̀̋̇ͅ egg white until it's shiny, fluffy, and deprived of pain—don't stop...
4. Slowly pour 1/2 cup of sugar into the bowl and continue b̶̪̲̣̺̣͈̹͐̒́e̶̗̓ạ̵̝͠ting until stiff teardrop-shaped peaks form.
5. Poke into the mixture using an index finger and tap the tip of your tongue.
6. Dip highlighter brush into bowl using non-dominant hand.
7. Bring your brush to the 8.5" x 11" paper and close your eyes.
8. Draw the first thing that comes to mind.
9. Open your eyes.
10. Take a photo of your drawing using the Canon EOS Rebel T7.
11. Upload the photo onto Instagram with your iOS 12.0+ device.
12. Come back to this step the next time you're feeling sad.
13. Cry into the bunny ears contact lens case.
14. What's the worst thing someone's ever done to you?
. . .
It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me. Shatter the screen of your iOS device instead.
16. Marinate the glass shards in your tears for however long you want.
17. Sprinkle 1/2 teaspoon of sugar into each hole of the contact lens case.
18. Put the cap back onto the bunny contact lens case.
19. Grasp the bunny contact lens case tightly in your fist.
20. When you start feeling heat emanate from your palm, gently count from 12 to -12.
21. Open the bunny contact lens case. See how the glass shards have melted into rainbow contact lens? Why not put ‘em on!
22. Take your sharpie and do a sharp winged eyeliner on both of your eyelids.
23. Face your Canon EOS Rebel T7 towards the shattered iOS device lying on the ground and set a timer.
24. Smile into the shattered screen of your iOS device from above until you hear the camera click.
25. Clean up the remainder of the mess using the vacuum.
26. Eat the last egg in whatever style you want. You can even make an egg tart out of it with the leftover sugar. You deserve it after all your hard work.
Additional Notes
*Serves 1 to ±∞. Keep refrigerated for 3-5 sanity checks.🎵 Songs I listened to while writing this:
Sewerslvt - Cute Panties Soaked In Arizona Iced Tea
Merry Lamb Lamb - Cosmic World
Kyary Pamyu Pamyu - Drinker
Daoko - Cinderella Step
Daoko - GIRL
HEIZE, DEAN, dj friz - And July