🤭 POV: You're Stalking Your Crush And She Knows It

Okay, first let’s search her up on Instagram.

Omgomg I found her. DAYUM THAT’S A SPICY PIC I—brb googling smth real quick… LOOOL WHAT IS SHE DOING IN THAT VIDEO 🤣 she highkey wack tho

Come to think of it, what does her username mean? I wonder how you pronounce her last name?? Ugh if only I knew enough Chinese… She probably has one of those pronunciation things enabled on LinkedIn. Let’s check… DYAUM fjawaifj she seems hella smort seeing her internships and all. Gonna hit that connect button real quick. Still dunno how to pronounce her last name though.

Google search time. I feel like a creeper doing this but it’s ‘kay cause I’m in incognito mode 😎 Don’t autocorrect me, Google!!! Oh wait lol there’s a Stanford admissions reader with the same name as her. I wonder if she knows. I could use it as a conversation starter. Wait, but then she’d know I looked her up…

Omg her anime aesthetic is soo cute. She could be my 3D waifuu~~ Let’s take a quick peek at her timeline. She doesn’t have any relationship info… wait my friend who’s friends with her on FB says she’s married to this one person… who tf is this?? they don’t even have a profile pic… some competition you are lol

WAIT SHE’S BI?? Shiiieet that doubles my number of competitors… wait she totally looks straight tho… she’s prob just in a phase lol

Ok I found her birthday lemme look up her zodiac real quick… Shiit she’s a scorpio aren’t those the worst?? lemme just google smth else real quick… YEAAA BOIS IM ON THE LIST WE MADE IT!!! time to hit her up!!1

Can’t forget the Chinese zodiac… Dragon, was it? brb googling again. DAMN now I wish I were a rat. Mom, why couldn’t you have given birth to me four years earlier? Wait, but then I would’ve graduated. Maybe it’s better this way.

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It’s been three days and she still hasn’t accepted my friend request. I wonder if she isn’t as active on FB? I’ll just wait for now. At least I have other platforms to see her pretty face.

SHE’S ACTIVE ON INSTA I REPEAT SHE’S ACTIVE ON INSTA

I hope she doesn’t catch me reading this. Maybe she knows already?

🥴 this was so fun to write 😜it's fucking satire stop being mad🙈 maybe im doing the same to u rn 🤔